Assessing Good, Buttwiping Bad

I've just not felt like I'm really alive in quite some time. Kind of feel like the walking dead. Start finding myself wanting to snap at these people I work with too. Its not their fault that they're old and falling apart and that if I ever get that old and falling apart I'm going to walk in front of a fucking train! They want you to make everything better but you can't because fuck, woman, or man (I deal with more women because they live longer, I suppose) I didn't make you 97 years old and with everything malfunctioning and hurting and I'm not God so I can't reverse it for you! And I suppose if he wanted to reverse it for you he'd have done it already! Sometimes I get really tired of dealing with the old and the infirm and people in general and want to go work somewhere with plants or something that won't get bitchy with me because I can't really help them, all I can do is make sure they dont' fall on their aged, infirm ass while they're walking to the bathroom! Forgive me, I'm just mentally and physically exhausted.

I like it when I get to do what I was hired to do--answer emergency calls. I'm actually pretty good at assessing when something's wrong with a person and when it can wait till they can see their doctor. I've heard "good call" more than once when I've sent a person out. I'll be hearing it after this recent emergency. The lady had right shoulder pain and shortness of breath. She has a pacemaker, just had a new stent put in on Monday. Blood pressure 100/70 (brought down by the nitro would be my guess) Tachycardia with pulse ranging between 115 and 125. 89% o2 saturation. Time to go to the hospital!

So why don't I work on an ambulance? My back is shot and the pay is lower than what I make here. Why don't I work in a hospital? My age and the fact that I've worked in nursing homes for so long are against me. So I was getting to use my license looking out for these folks, answering when they called. Sometimes they'd fallen but weren't hurt and if I could get them up by myself I did, otherwise I called Lift Assist to help. Sometimes they'd fallen and were hurt, so I called 911. Sometimes its a medical emergency like this one. But I always felt like I was using my EMT license in some capacity most of the time when people called.

That was before Alvin N. Chipmunkk decided it was time to turn this department into Toilet Assistance Central. That's why I'm frustrated as hell. And that's why I need to bitch about the fact that EMT'S AND FIREFIGHTERS DON'T MAKE JACK SHIT! From what I hear, cops don't either. What kind of joke is it to pay an entry level EMT $8.50 per hour, a firefighter $11 per hour and a cop $30,000 per year. But if you're a thug on the basketball court you're pulling millions. Something is really fucked with our priorities in this world.

I might feel better if I kick Alvin N. Chipmunkk's nuts. He has a big jar of them on his desk. I'm thinking if I boot them out the window it will relieve some stress!