But Doesn't Independent Mean You Can Do It Yourself??

The department in which I work is called "Independent Care." I am supposed to be here for emergency situations and to take care of paperwork and sundry tasks. So how the hell come I've been doing scheduled bathroom assists for one resident for three months now and for another one for the past two weeks??

Methinks its because Alvin N. Chipmunkk and his cronies like the extra Quatloos they get for our providing this service. We charge the resident 180,000 Quatloos (Thats $18 U.S. Currency) for making sure they get on and off the can without falling on their can. So instead of insisting that residents such as "Albert" and "Joanna" either get a 24-hour caregiver or move to assisted living, they continue collecting this fee every time the Resident Assistant visits.

Albert and Joanna are neat people. I'm just tired.